Blog

Occasional writing about online friendship, chat, and why so much of the social internet feels the way it does.

How to be a better listener (especially in text)

How to be a better listener in text conversation - respond to what was actually said, ask useful follow-ups, remember details, and resist fixing everything.

How to keep an online conversation going

How to keep an online text conversation going - practical ways past the hi-how-are-you wall, without scripts, tricks, or doing all the work yourself.

In praise of 1-on-1 chat

Why 1-on-1 text chat can feel different from a busy group - room to finish a thought, follow a tangent, and get to know the person behind the messages.

Questions to ask a new online friend

Questions to ask a new online friend that lead somewhere interesting - without turning a friendly chat into an interview or forcing instant intimacy.

Random chat without the sleaze

Why random chat attracts sleaze, how bad behaviour drives good people away, and what accountability can do to protect friendly conversations.

Sites like Omegle for text chat

Looking for sites like Omegle for text chat? How to choose between text roulette, chat rooms, and ongoing 1-on-1 conversations without dating or sleaze.

What old chat rooms got right

What old-school chat rooms got right about text, curiosity, and chance encounters - and what a friendlier version of that internet needs today.

What to write to a new pen pal

What to write to a new pen pal - an example first letter, ideas for introducing yourself, and ways to make replying easier without sounding rehearsed.

Apps to make friends: a field guide

Looking for apps to make friends? Compare local activity apps, friend finders, pen-pal apps, and chat communities by the kind of friendship you want.

Chat without dating

Want to chat without dating or flirting? Why a clear no-dating rule can make talking to strangers easier, and what to look for in a friendship community.

Online friendships, not romance

Online friendships deserve to be valued in their own right. On making platonic friends, meeting people unlike you, and leaving romance out of it.

How to find a pen pal (and keep in touch)

How to find a pen pal for paper letters or online correspondence, choose a suitable community, write a first message, and settle into a rhythm.

How to make friends online as an adult

How to make friends online as an adult - find a place you enjoy, start a real conversation, and build the small habits that turn strangers into friends.

Safe chat sites: an honest guide for adults

How to assess safe chat sites for adults - check their rules, reporting tools, privacy, and accountability before trusting the promise on the homepage.

Whatever happened to pen pals?

Pen pals are still here, on paper and online. What thoughtful correspondence gives us, and why faster messages don't have to mean less care.